Random stuff bout Me, Chad, Shelby or anything else I feel like talking about

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

A Letter to Alicia

Dear Alicia,
Oh where do I begin? Is it with the simple statement that I wish I wasn't even having to write this? Or how it brings tears to my eyes that you will not be able to read it? But then again...the Internet is everywhere so maybe Heaven has it as well? :)

So many emotions are raging through me right now. I am sad you are gone, I am angry that you were taken from us way too early, I feel guilty that I sometimes take life for granted when it can be taken away from any of us so easily.

Then I have ridiculously silly thoughts pop through my head like "Well she won't have to worry about if she shaved her legs or not before wearing shorts!" or "Won't she be glad that she won't have to read all of those political jab statuses on Facebook!" Silly right? I mean we would all rather have you here (and I am sure you would want to be here!) to even worry about those things!

I know we weren't the closest of friends, but I was thankful to call you a friend! I can only wish to be as caring and compassionate as you were. To see the outpouring of messages to you and your family just warms my heart. I hope that when I leave this earth that I leave behind as many loved ones as you did!

You will be missed but you will always be with us. If not in our hearts then in your boys who will carry on your legacy. We will be able to take a glance at them and see a little part of you - be it in their looks, thoughts/ideas, or even their attitude!

Don't worry as we will keep an eye on all of your boys, even the big one! Chad is seeing to that! I foresee Flat Alicia going on many motorcycle rides with them!

Hugs until we meet again!

Your Friend,
Stephanie

Thursday, August 7, 2014

Wanna Join Me on the Roller Coaster of Emotions?

First off, I am not a big fan of roller coasters. Second, I am even less of a fan when that roller coaster is not of the  mechanical kind and instead is one that goes whizzing up and loops around the emotions of fear, anger, guilt, frustration, sadness...all in the same day!

As I have mentioned in previous posts, getting older can suck. Not only do we develop aches and pains that were non-existent before but we have more daily issues to deal with, more financial hurdles, dealing with health issues either for ourselves or for our friends or family members.

I remember last year asking Chad the question on if we were at that stage in our life where we would be attending more memorial services then weddings. Granted it could be that as we get older the age range of our friends change and we will have friends that are older. Regardless though....I think we have reached that pinnacle point in our life. The top of the roller coaster...and quite honestly I don't want to start the descend.

We have a dear friend of ours that has been fighting cancer. She was diagnosed back in April (April 1st I believe...Oh how I wish it was some person's sick idea of an April Fool's joke...). It just pains me to see her and her family struggling through all of this. I mean it's not even happening to me, yet,  I am like "Why?? Why her?" Not that I would wish this on anyone (though honestly I can think of a few people that might deserve it!) but why this sweet, funny, amazing lady??

It makes me angry, then sad, then angry again, then guilty because I am healthy. Here we go! Climbing, climbing, climbing and............Sssssssssssssqueeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalllll!

I hate roller coasters! Give me the simple carousel any day. I will just sit on my horsey (or in some cases, a horse size cat?? Seriously what were the carousel people smoking that day?)) and go around and around in circles. Slow and simple....

It is so funny how as kids we want to be adults. I laugh at Shelby and just shake my head. Oh sweet child, just enjoy your childhood. Adulthood will be here quicker than you will know it and you will be going "Wait, stop. Let me off this ride!"

However, here is a quote I found that sums it up pretty well.
Life is a roller coaster; you can either scream every time you hit a bump or you can throw your hands up in the air and enjoy!